A Beginner's Guide to Writing a Journal

1. Understanding the Benefits of Journaling

Before diving into the practical steps, it’s important to understand 2 things: first, the WHY  journaling is so awesome (scientifically and biologically speaking) and second, HOW it can be beneficial to our lives.

So let’s start with the WHY (shout out to Simon Sineak). The reason you don’t want to skip over your WHY, is because it’s scientifically proven that we stick with new habits / projects / intentions when we know, understand and stand behind our reason to pursue that passion/ activity/ mission. If no one has ever told you how to pick a strong WHY, here’s the Coles notes version: get very aware of the core issue you are looking to solve. Here are some examples with the core issue in bold to show you just how varied these WHYs can look: “I really want to heal but I can’t afford to spend $150/hr on a therapist”, “Everyone at school is doing this and I don’t want to feel left out“, “I just work, come home, binge watch something, sleep and repeat. I feel so alone and like I don’t know myself anymore and I don’t want to feel like this anymore – I need to give myself some hope. “, “I get stressed thinking about everything I need to take care of and do and I feel no one understands. I feel silly reaching out to my mom/ friends all the time and I don’t want to feel like I can’t ‘adult’ and handle life’s problems“, “I think I don’t love my husband anymore…I’m not ready to share this with him because there are days I get terrified of what my life would be like if I actually went through with that I’m tempted to do. I feel like everyone around me is in a happy marriage and won’t understand or would probably judge me/ think I’m ungrateful if I shared this with them. I just need a to think through and evaluate every thing I am feeling without having to worry about what anyone would say“,  “I want to start journaling because I know it’s a great tool to help me deal with my anxiety but I don’t know how to start and I’m so tired of not feeling capable and I don’t want to feel like this anymore“, ” I love the new life I’m building and the memories I’m creating and I want to remember these moments forever!“. Note how all the core issues focus on what you really WANT or DON’T WANT. Identify that line for yourself and feel no shame in feeling it – this is incredibly personal and there is NO WRONG ANSWER.

So while you work out your personal WHY, let me give you the scientific reason HOW journaling is perhaps the BEST way to work though all of our life’s problems, difficult feelings, and process the different phases of our personal growth.

There are many health benefits to journaling that many people brush over because they are  unaware of the biology behind it, but let’s just explore the core one today.

First, let’s be fully aware that a lot of the mental problems that we face are because we physically keep these problems in our head. This doesn’t seem so terrible until we understand that our brain is an incredibly powerful tool that can either help or hinder is depending on how we choose to utilize it. Our brain is wired for survival. So any information that it’s given, is quickly paired against the playbook for survival. So the longer you keep an item in your mind, the more it will create connections to emphasize the urgency to ACT. These connections – increase our anxiety and fear. And the simplest way to remove fear is to step into action. (Fear lives and grows in the space between a thought and the time you act on it). The least terrifying way and fastest way to deal with a problem that you might fear / feel uncomfortable about is to take the ACTION immediately by writing about it. (Remember with printable journals, there is no barrier or delay to action – unlike waiting for an appointment to speak to someone, waiting for a journal to be delivered etc.).  The act of writing forces our racing thoughts to slow down to the pace of our ability to write. When we slow down, we naturally progress from just recording thoughts to “having a conversation with ourselves” — remember, humans are inherently social beings, we (our brains) learn by asking questions — doing this alone when you’re journaling will look like having a conversation with yourself and is the perfect way to find solutions that work for you even if you feel you don’t have the answers.

2. Choosing the Right Journal
The answer to this step hinges on your WHY in step 1. There are thousands of journals on the market. I am under no delusion that this is the only place on the internet. Which place you go to and which journal you select will depend on what core issue you wish to deal with. Taking an example I shared in step one, I will draw some parallels and make this connection as clear as possible. 

Example: “I want to start journaling because I know it’s a great tool to help me deal with my anxiety but I don’t know how to start and I’m so tired of not feeling capable and I don’t want to feel like this anymore” — what this WHY tell us is that you really want to build CONFIDENCE. In life, confidence comes from building up a skill slowly over time – like taking ballet /karate/ painting/ coding etc. classes. There are so many people who might want to learn ballet, and yet hesitate because they know that for them in their confidence journey “failing” in front of a class of other beginners or a teacher would be the thing that would prevent them from continuing on an otherwise really positive habit for them. They require a gentler way to build their confidence. What this WHY tells us is that this person wants the “cheat code” to feeling confident in this new activity so they don’t fail publicly and can slowly build their confidence up and continue to help themselves. With this WHY, the type of journal that you want to select will depend on the answer to this next question: How do you best express yourself? Is it through writing? speaking? drawing? If it is through writing or speaking, a guided journal is the best tool which allows you to walk / talk yourself through questions that are designed to help you focus on core / common areas of healing. If drawing/ painting etc. is how you best express yourself, an art or junk journal is what you want to purchase. These will also come with guided questions to prompt you, but instead of lines to write, they give you a blank canvas to express yourself in the way that suits you best.

 OK so now we have a strong WHY to keep us anchored in this new habit, we know what kind of journal we need to get so our natural way of personal expression is supported, now let’s look at setting up our environment to make this new habit easy to maintain. Why is this important? Because life gets in the way, and getting the benefits from any new habit relies heavily on our ability to be consistent with this new habit. By curating our environment, we are able to make this new habit inviting and in the path of our existing life routine so there is no way to detour around it. So let’s explore what needs to be done.

3. Setting Up Your Journaling Space
When we decide (in our minds) to start our new habit, our brain (which is wired for survival) will resist – even if it is logically and clearly apparently how this new habit will benefit us. Why? Because the brain sees this change of habit as a step outside of its comfort zone and it is unsure of how to manage the new risk variables that may arise in this new activity. So to make your brain an ally in this new habit, you need to create an environment of comfort for this new habit to exist. Creating a comfortable and inviting journaling space can make the experience more enjoyable. Comfort for a journalling habit can look like (but not limited by), any one of the following things: 

Find a Quiet Spot: Choose a quiet, comfortable spot in your home (or even in your neighbourhood – local cafe, library etc.) where you won’t be disturbed. This could be a favourite chair, a place with a calming/inspiring view, a place that doesn’t receive a lot of distracting traffic, a place with lots of background noise that fills the space with lots of auditory movement so you don’t feel alone, yet without anything specific for your brain to focus on…you define what quiet means to you.

Find a comfortable time: journaling is not an activity to be rushed. Think about how you feel when someone else rushes you. You feel put on the spot, worry and second guess the decisions made in that moment, feel unsafe / not respected…now imagine if we do that to ourselves…that is a sure way to not feel safe in your own heart and mind. Find a time during the day where you know your external interruptions will be limited. There are factors you can control and those you can’t. For example, you can choose to put your phone on do not disturb for an hour while you journal, but telling your kids not to bug you for an hour may not always work. So choose your time based on the different “attention demanding” variables you have in your life.

Gather Your Supplies: This point is extremely subjective. Journaling has grown from being just a paper and pen activity to including a craft box of “necessary supplies”. If no one has told you, this is me telling you now: you don’t need anything else. Especially not when you start. It’s like buying all the hockey equipment before you even see if you can stand on the ice without breaking your ankles. When you do progress in your journalling habit, and you invariably reach the point of no return where you want to make this a creative expression – you can look at expanding into getting the following supplies: specialized pens (calligraphy etc), markers, stickers, washi tape, ephemera, stamps, and other decorative items to personalize the story of your life.

Create a Ritual: Starting a hobby / new habit is extremely easy. We’re driven by the motivation and rush of “the great new solution to our life”. But like any new habit, the hard part is making this an ongoing habit that is consistent. Establishing a  ritual before and after your journaling will make this an experience that leaves you in peace and feeling whole and helps you transition into and our of a reflective state. This could involve lighting a candle or playing soft music before journaling, or sipping a cup of tea while journaling, or even praying after journaling. This ritual will depend deeply on what helps you feel relaxed and open.

4. Overcoming Common Challenges
It’s normal to encounter challenges — let’s not delude ourselves. Here are some common obstacles that can arise when we start journaling and how to overcome them:

Writer’s Block: If you’re feeling stuck, use prompts (our Self Care subscription delivers prompts to you monthly) or write about something simple, like what you observe (rather than what you feel) – what you see, hear, smell etc around you. Remember, there’s no right or wrong way to journal.

Perfectionism: Don’t worry about grammar, spelling, or how your writing sounds. The purpose of journaling is to express yourself freely, without judgment. How do we give ourselves the grace to do this without judgement? We keep in mind the primary goal: OFFLOAD thoughts and feelings. 

Start Small: Even if you’re busy, try to find a few minutes each day to jot down a quick reflection or thought. Journaling doesn’t have to be a lengthy process. When you get deep into this practise, and start to feel the positive effects from this habit, you will naturally make more time for this habit. Until then, just focus on consistency. To encourage consistency, make your measurement for success achievable. So instead of making your goal journal for 15 minutes. Make it: give space daily to think of what bothers me, and maybe write / draw about what I feel. This way with no defined measurable time frame / output – you are increasing your chances for success and therefore make you build your confidence in sticking with a new habit. In the beginning – this is how your goal should look like.

Be Flexible: While consistency is important, don’t be too rigid. If you miss a day or don’t feel like writing, that’s okay. Journaling should be a pleasurable and fulfilling activity, not a chore. Just keep this rule of thumb in mind: If you miss one day – it’s a hiccup, if you miss more than one day in a row – it’s a habit. Draw your line between flexibility and consistency.

Use Reminders: Set reminders on your phone or place your journal in a visible spot to remind yourself to write, or in a “habit pathway”. Example – your bedtime routine: you brush your teeth, walk to your bed and put your phone down on the side table – and if you place your journal and pen there, these tools are now “in the pathway” of your existing bedtime habit which will “prompt” you to commence your new habit.